How are you doing?
It’s been awhile since I checked in without talking about something topical. That has been good. There’s a lot going on. For myself, I have been using my experience in hospital chaplaincy to examine social systems, entrenched personal biases, and a way forward.
I’ve been talking with friends and engaging with the institutions I’m affiliated with and reading up on the history of white supremacy and black lived experience for the past several years, and continue to do so. Sociological studies can be telling, but the history itself reveals the depths and lengths of generational trauma enacted by white people and white society on black people.
As a point of clarification, I made a commitment in 2017 to include materials on lack of racial, ethnic, sexual, and gender representation, as well as domestic social justice issues, and I still believe – maybe even more strongly now – that this work must be sustained and consistent. Performative posts during a period of heightened social consciousness is not the work. Equity is not offering someone a place at the table. It’s remembering that you never had the right to police the bounds of who gets to sit at the table in the first place. White people must be careful not to use our own claims of anti-racism as a weapon, because that just means we’re grasping to retain the same power dynamics white supremacy convinced us we were owed. To that end, I welcome guest posts and resources on this topic.
In the past few weeks, I’ve had a lot of trouble with emotional regulation and a short term relapse in a trauma response I thought I had control over. It has convinced me, finally, that I should meet with a therapist. Due to my work schedule right now, that’s not possible. But it will be a priority as soon as I complete my internship.
A reader recently pointed out that my most popular post of all time, Ethical Alternatives to Madewell, had outdated information regarding Corporate Social Responsibility standards. When I went to look for updated information, I was surprised to see that my post came up first in Google results for “Madewell ethical.” It was a good reminder that having good SEO means a greater responsibility to accuracy. I have updated that post accordingly.
It’s a good segue into why I’m wearing a pair of new Everlane denim. While I recently downgraded them to so-so on the ethics scale, I would put them at about the same place as Madewell. That means that, while there are clear issues with ethical standards being enforced, there is still a kind of positive momentum that makes them an option when there aren’t a lot of others. I have become loyal to Everlane’s Curvy line and lightweight chinos because I have the worst time finding pants that fit my proportions. I actually tried three other brands first, but none of them worked out, and now I’m trying to figure out returns and refunds amid continuing warehouse delays.
The Curvy Cheeky solves the waist-gapping issue I had with the standard style. I do wish that Everlane would consider making the thigh and knee slightly larger in their Curvy styles. I know that not all people with curvy hips and butt have thicker thighs, but that is a continuing fit issue for me. These are much better than the original, but they still feel tight in the knee and thigh when seated. I’m wearing a size 30.