Sustainable Self Care | How I Settle into an Evening of Relaxation

Self Care Tuesday

While undergoing my chaplaincy internship, I found that I was often exhausted by Tuesday afternoon. While strange – after all, I was only two days into my week – if I learned anything while working at the hospital, it was that I needed to take care of myself if I was to offer care to others. So, one week, as my cohort and I were preparing to leave for the day, I yelled “Self care Tuesday!” And so began #selfcaretuesday.

Each Tuesday evening, after I’ve finished my daily tasks, I light a candle, pour myself a drink (bourbon or tea, usually), put on pajamas, and do…whatever I want to do. Most of the time, that’s watching an old TV show or movie. Sometimes it’s dyeing my hair, reading a magazine, or playing around with clothes in my closet. No matter what, I try to create a real attitude shift away from productivity and toward cultivating a sense of simple, luxurious, peace.

You don’t need much for Self Care Tuesday, though comfy clothes and a way to signal the time (like a candle or incense) is a nice touch. The important thing is to ask yourself:

• What have I been putting off that I’d really love to do/watch/read?
• What would help me feel relaxed?
• What would give me joy?
• What would make me feel better about myself?

Importantly, especially if snacks or alcohol or involved, I make sure not to over-indulge. While a little bit of a good thing is relaxing, too much of it will make me feel unwell.

I am very aware that self care does not fix the world’s woes, or even offer solutions to real problems in our own lives. It shouldn’t be conceived of as an effective coping mechanism for trauma, isolation, or anxiety. It’s simply a way for me to check in with myself and take back a small measure of agency for a couple of hours each week.

Below, I have included a couple of my standbys for getting into the #selfcareTuesday mood.

Settling In for a Quiet Evening

Public Goods Lavender & Vanilla Candle

The perfect understated fragrance that doesn’t give me a headache or take over the room. (P.S. if you’re looking for a good fall scent, I recommend this one)

PACT Hoodie

I like to order up a size or two for maximum cocoon possibilities.

Where the Crawdads Sing

This story was gripping, fantastical, and had just enough seriousness to draw me in without devastating me. I love narratives that make the landscape a significant theme.

Entireworld Sweatpants

Cozy, full length lounge pants that aren’t oversized flannels make me feel a little more put together, but thrifted or secondhand works, too.

Equal Exchange Ginger Tea

The absolute best ginger tea, this one steeps strong in only a few minutes. And it’s fair trade. You can occasionally get this tea and other Equal Exchange products at your local Ten Thousand Villages. See my hot toddy recipe.

Stoneware Mug

I use a set of mugs I thrifted a few years ago. This 16 oz mug is great for making a big cup of tea. Sometimes I’ll add a splash of bourbon for a hot toddy.